I have lived long enough to have substantial pre-Internet memories, so I can remember debates among friends getting heated and personal without the help of anonymity or technological depersonalization we often blame for the intensity of conflict online. Message boards and social media, blogs and comments sections — these have only brought to light and put on record the viciousness people have always been capable of.
One big difference I have noticed, however, is that it has become more difficult to cool things down, to act as a moderating influence, or to suggest a meeting of minds. Twitter’s 140 character limits, the sloppiness of instant commentary, the hot take make it harder to bring out nuance, context, or complexity, while encouraging people to double down.
But it’s not just the tech. How do you find common ground with people entrenched in white supremacy? Where do you compromise with homophobes? You can’t even get privileged white liberals to smell their own shit half the time. “It smells like roses because my good intentions!”
And that’s not even touching upon misogyny, transphobia and classism. So I wind up with a migraine after half an hour on the Internet and think about ways to get away from it.
Throws cartoon into the void and runs.
Fetch: HEY LOOK! TWO OF YOUR FRIENDS ARE ARGUING.
Kevin appears.
Kevin: GREAT. PERSONAL OR POLITICAL?
Fetch: I DON'T THINK THEY'RE MAKING THAT DISTINCTION.
Kevin: CAN'T HEAR IT. ANYTHING I CARE ABOUT?
Fetch: O-O-OH YES! YOU HAVE A VERY STRONG OPINION ON IT!
Kevin: OH NO!
Fetch: MAYBE YOU CAN FIND A MIDDLE GROUND.
Kevin: IS THERE ONE?
Fetch: OF COURSE NOT.
Kevin: DAMMIT.
Fetch: KISS ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS GOODBYE!
Discussion ¬