Sessions
As of this writing, one of Trump’s lawyers is denying that the president is under investigation for obstruction of justice, contradicting the president’s own tweets (which so far we are expected to treat as official TrumpAdmin word…I think…).Earlier this week the Attorney General, one former Senator from Alabama, Jefferson Beauregard Sessions, whom long watchers of Washington know is a creepy racist thug disguised as a creepy gentile elf, obfuscated the Senate investigation into that matter and all others related to Russiagate (the -gate with no real center), by invoking DOJ policies that do not exist and executive privilege that has not been declared.
Nothing is real, everything is permitted? Gaslighting taken to new levels? Or just an administration that is flailing to hide its innate corruption? Each and all are possible.
For now Jeff has earned another week in his post, giving him more time to come after cancer patients smoking medical weed and Honduran children fleeing gang violence.
↓ Transcript
Fetch finds Attorney General Jeff Sessions naked, chained to a tree.
Sessions: I HAVE FAILED MY MASTER.
Fetch: NO, JEFFERSON, YOU WERE A GOOD BOY!
Sessions: NO, I WAS S'POSED TO LEAD CONGRESS OFF MASTER'S SCENT. NOW THEY'RE ON HIM LIKE A HOUND ON A COON.
Fetch: DEMOCRATS, SURE. BUT REPUBLICANS DON'T GIVE A CRAP.
Trump arrives, holding a bag and dangling a treat.
Trump: STOP WHINING, BEAUREGARD. I GOT A TREAT FOR YA.
Sessions: KITTEN LIVERS! OH, BOSS! YOU DO FORGIVE ME!
Trump: OF COURSE I DO. WHO'S MY LITTLE JEFFY? WHO WANTS TO FIRE THE SPECIAL PROSECUTOR?
Sessions: CAN I?
Fetch, walking away: I THINK I'LL JUST RECUSE MYSELF.
Sessions: I HAVE FAILED MY MASTER.
Fetch: NO, JEFFERSON, YOU WERE A GOOD BOY!
Sessions: NO, I WAS S'POSED TO LEAD CONGRESS OFF MASTER'S SCENT. NOW THEY'RE ON HIM LIKE A HOUND ON A COON.
Fetch: DEMOCRATS, SURE. BUT REPUBLICANS DON'T GIVE A CRAP.
Trump arrives, holding a bag and dangling a treat.
Trump: STOP WHINING, BEAUREGARD. I GOT A TREAT FOR YA.
Sessions: KITTEN LIVERS! OH, BOSS! YOU DO FORGIVE ME!
Trump: OF COURSE I DO. WHO'S MY LITTLE JEFFY? WHO WANTS TO FIRE THE SPECIAL PROSECUTOR?
Sessions: CAN I?
Fetch, walking away: I THINK I'LL JUST RECUSE MYSELF.
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