The Stolen Child — Page 4
The rules of the Fae are complex. Fetch will get into that in the next few pages. But suffice to say, never thank a fairy no matter how nice they may have been to you. There are a few different explanations offered by folklorists, pagans, and fiction writers about why the Fae take offense at a thank you, but probably the most likely reason is it comes off condescending or dismissive. You might just deepen your debt to them.
↓ Transcript
PANEL 1: Fetch and Owen peer from behind a dolmen.
OWEN: Is that thing gone?
FETCH: Hmm. He curled up like a cockroach in boric acid. I should lay off the bratwurst.
PANEL 2: Owen confronts Fetch.
OWEN: Anyone else who wants to eat me? Do farts work on them, too?
FETCH: Er, yeah. I suppose I should get you oriented.
PANEL 3: They walk through a field of wildflowers
OWEN: Can I get a weapon?
FETCH: What? NO! No weapons. Christ. Don’t use a gun or a knife on a Fae creature. They’ll just turn it against you. Besides — iron is verboten.
PANEL 4: Close up of Fetch walking on the road.
FETCH: The rules are simple: Don’t be rude. Don’t tell the Fae your name. Don’t accept their gifts. Especially the food! Or you’ll be trapped here forever.
PANEL 5: Owen counts off the rules on his fingers, Fetch is proud.
OWEN: No rude, but no food. Got it.
FETCH: Yes, excellent.
PANEL 6: Owen has the same expression, Fetch alarmed.
OWEN: If they give me a gift, say, “No, thank you.”
FETCH: Agh! Don’t say “thank you”!
OWEN: Is that thing gone?
FETCH: Hmm. He curled up like a cockroach in boric acid. I should lay off the bratwurst.
PANEL 2: Owen confronts Fetch.
OWEN: Anyone else who wants to eat me? Do farts work on them, too?
FETCH: Er, yeah. I suppose I should get you oriented.
PANEL 3: They walk through a field of wildflowers
OWEN: Can I get a weapon?
FETCH: What? NO! No weapons. Christ. Don’t use a gun or a knife on a Fae creature. They’ll just turn it against you. Besides — iron is verboten.
PANEL 4: Close up of Fetch walking on the road.
FETCH: The rules are simple: Don’t be rude. Don’t tell the Fae your name. Don’t accept their gifts. Especially the food! Or you’ll be trapped here forever.
PANEL 5: Owen counts off the rules on his fingers, Fetch is proud.
OWEN: No rude, but no food. Got it.
FETCH: Yes, excellent.
PANEL 6: Owen has the same expression, Fetch alarmed.
OWEN: If they give me a gift, say, “No, thank you.”
FETCH: Agh! Don’t say “thank you”!
Spread the joy:
It is said, too,
that they value gifts, more than anything,
but that their own gifts they value more than any other.
An so, never offer more than you can give;
Nae give more than you offer;
Or offer thanks for a fairly chiseled trade:
Nor accept more than ye can return;
Or bargain more than, or e’en equal to, your life.
And as for food and drink… oh, those are gifts of life, ain’t they?